Tag: future

The Sequestran Dilemma – Chapter 2.16

That Sinking Feeling…..

As I had stepped through the entrance doors to the CombatDrome though I did feel a distinct downward pull on my body, generally everything looked fine and actually quite normal. There, right in front of me, was the floor as one might expect. Ok it was checkered, a bit like a chessboard, and made my eyes go a little funny when I first looked at it, but it did look exactly like a normal floor. However, I quickly discovered that stepping onto it was more like stepping into it.

As I put my front leg forward and my foot down, I felt my body begin to fall away from me. My right leg seemed to stretch to a very abnormal length as the floor became concave beneath my feet and also expanded in all directions, distorting the black and white squares immediately beneath me. I sensed myself being sucked into the floor as my body grew even more, extending the distance from my mouth to my feet most alarmingly. Surely, I thought, I would soon distend some part of me so much that I would break into two somewhere along my body.

As ever, my training for unexpected emergencies like this kicked in instinctively, as one would expect. Accordingly, I freaked out totally as panic engulfed me and I tried to scream ‘HELPPPPPPPPP CAAAAAT’. Unfortunately not much more than a long groaning guttural grunting noise emerged from my mouth, as my body continued its expansion and I slowly but surely sank down into the floor.

To be continued in Chapter 3……

The Sequestran Dilemma – Chapter 2.15

A Hole is a Hole, or is it?

As I stood up I accidentally stood on one of the Prorex’s hands but she didn’t stir. Cat had certainly sent her into dreamland, which would be a nightmare I thought for anyone unfortunate enough to be in one of her dreams. Anyway, we needed to get on I decided and sort out this Drome hole now that the Prorex was thankfully out of the equation.

I stood tall, now that Cat had fixed the sensors in my shoes before straightening my tunic, determined to recover my poise and dominance over the situation.

“Right,” I said to Cat in the authoritative tone I normally reserved for circumstances when I was about to do something stupidly brave, “I’m going to take a look at this blasted hole. I want to get away from this mad place as soon as possible. And definitely before she wakes up,” I said, accidentally treading on her other hand as I walked away.

“I would strongly advise against that,” said Cat.

“Why?” I queried, “is there a problem? You’ve  been and looked. Surely it’s safe enough. And it is just just a hole, right? It’s simple and straightforward in my view. It’s a hole, probably caused by some sort of air subsidence, and we just need to advise it to be filled in. Don’t know really why I was called in the first place. Or why I’m going to look at it now. But I’m going to, if only to show that potty Prorex that I’m in charge here,” I ended triumphantly.

“I really would strongly advise that you leave this hole well alone. It is no ordinary hole trust me,” said Cat.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” I snapped at Cat.

“About what?” enquired Cat.

“Suggesting firstly that I trust you and secondly that this is no ordinary hole. A hole is a hole. Well, so no long as it’s not a black hole of course. It’s not a black hole is it?” I asked as I momentarily paused my determined march to the Drome, thinking obviously if it was a black hole, well, that was different.

“No, it’s not a black hole,” said Cat, “definitely not a black hole. Buhhh….”

Cat’s intended ‘but’ was cut off by the instant return of my new found determination to get on with it kicking back in, as I responded,

“Well there we are then. If it’s not a black hole then I can go and have a look at it can’t I? You have after all”

“Yes, but you don’t understand. It’s no ordinary hole,” blustered Cat as he hovered up beside my head. “For one thing, it’s really really big and…..”

I cut him off again mid sentence as I reached the main doors to the Drome with,

“Ok, I get it. It’s a big hole. I’ll be careful. Like I said before, a hole is a hole. If it’s not a black hole. And as it’s not, what’s the worst that can happen? As long as I don’t fall in I’ll be alright.”

With that line, which, assuming I survive will be a stand out one, I fell into the hole having wrenched open the large double entrance doors to the Drome. This was despite Cat’s last minute efforts to stop me, by hooking one of his paws into the belt of my trousers and slamming his hovering capability into sharp reverse.

Cat was absolutely right. This was no ordinary hole. For a start, it wasn’t really a hole at all or at least not a hole that looked much like a hole.

To be continued…….

The Sequestran Dilemma – Chapter 2.14

The Prorex gets Poleaxed

I lay there groaning as the pain began to slowly subside. It was, I thought, now only at about 9 rather than 10 on the agony scale. Suddenly I found I could say single syllables again albeit with quite appreciable spaces between them.

“Ca, hat,” I said, “wa,….ta…… ha….puh, puh…..und….?”

Cat looked quizzically at me and responded, “Are you asking what happened?”

“Yah…ha..” I gasped.

“Oh the Prorex kneed you in your basement department. I think she was annoyed,” said Cat.

“The wi, chuh,” I exhaled.

“I really think you just better lay there for a while until you can say whole words again or this conversation will go on forever,” said Cat.

I curled up even more tightly into a ball to do as Cat suggested. Meanwhile Cat hovered up and flew off in the direction of the entrance proper of the CombatDrome. I watched through gritted eyes from my prone position, gut hammering out big pain signals to my brain, as Cat got smaller before he disappeared from my view through the Drome’s entrance portal

I briefly wondered what he might find before suddenly seeing right in front of my nose a yellow bow. Oh my goodness, the Prorex was back and ranting at me again. I instinctively scrunched my body up into an even tighter ball, expecting to be on the receiving end of yet more physical abuse.

As I tensed every muscle in my body and closed my eyes, I heard a thud. But I felt no pain so assumed the thud s was not due to her boot connecting with any part of my body. I opened my eyes and there right in front of them, on the ground, were now two yellow bows. Two feet, encased in 2 shoes, were effectively attached to the bows. As I lifted my head slightly I could see along the length of the once again prostrate and immobile body of the Prorex. The Prorex had been poleaxed, which quite pleased me of course a) because she was a loony and b) because she’d just about been ready to start beating me up again! But how had she come to be poleaxed I wondered?

As I sat up, now able to as the pains emanating from my groin had subsided markedly, I realised Cat was back. Hovering just above me he said,

“Oh dear. How unfortunate. I came back at such a speed from the Drome I didn’t see her until it was too late. Lucky I’m made of Rubanon. If I was ordinary metal I think the Prorex would be an ex-Prorex right now.”

“Well done Cat. Well done,” I said enthusiastically. “Ordinarily I’m not sure about a robot attacking a human but in this case I fully condone it. The woman is a total nutter.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” said Cat defensively, “I didn’t attack her. She got in the way.”

“Thank goodness for me she did,” I responded, “can you do it again if she recovers consciousness?”

To be continued…….

The Sequestran Dilemma – Chapter 2.13

Ouch, that hurts…

No one had ever called me a terboid trissuk before, which sounded pretty awful. I made a mental note to ask Cat what it actually was at some point. For now I spoke again over her continuing rant that was now expelling other words I wasn’t too sure about in my direction.

“Madam, can I please remind you that had it not been for my quick thinking, allied to the averagely able assistance of my AI, you would still be hanging upside down being suffocated by your skirts and flashing your bloomers.”

I was quite pleased at my ‘counter’ outburst. Not only had I remembered the ancient name for referring to expansive female undergarments, I knew that my reference to Cat as my ‘AI’ would irritate the Cosmos out of him.

As Cat visibly bristled with indignation, to my side I noticed that the Prorex had hitched her skirts up to well above her knees. Good grief, I thought, we’d only just managed to cover that lot up. Before I could exclaim ‘Madam, please, control yourself or some appropriate set of words, my brain screamed ‘pain’ through what must have been every available synapse. As my eyes crossed and forehead compressed to into the bridge of my nose, a scream to curdle baffleberry juice erupted from the depths of my vocal machinery. The scream felt as though it was dragging my lungs from my chest and through my mouth. As it tailed off, through lack of available air, I collapsed to my knees and became increasingly aware of a very heavy weight pulling at my groin.

The weight spread into my abdomen as I wished that my maker had given me biceps instead of testicles between my legs. Nerves of steel would have been a very appropriate alternative. However, my testicles just had standard nerves and these nerves were protesting violently at what had been a clearly unexpected trauma ‘below stairs’. As I curried up into as small a ball as I could manage in a belated attempt to protect myself, Cat, who was now on the ground as well, padded over and said,

“Oh my, you poor thing. That must have hurt. She has very bony looking knees.”

“Huhhk-kaha,” I gasped.

“Totally understand you slipping into an unfamiliar dialect when under stress. I have to say though that one is very unfamiliar. Of the 9,456 Galactic dialects I am programmed with “Huhhk-kaha,” doesn’t get returned at all when I search. Perhaps you could repeat in case I misheard?” said Cat.

“MMMAHAHU- Guh,” I sort of squeaked out.

“Nope, don’t think we are really getting anywhere here. Maybe you should just get your breath back before you exhale anything else,” advised Cat.

To be continued……..

The Sequestran Dilemma – Chapter 2.12

The Prorex Lets Loose

I really wasn’t sure what a Yskutan wave was. Nor indeed how to really say it, writing it down now as I am. Cat had pronounced it ‘Waskutan’ and I vaguely recollected some scientist with that name in the news a few years ago, being given an award for some startling discovery. Something about special waves created by Bosun computing that had very old grey PhysITs wetting themselves with excitement. But, really, for all I knew a Yskutan wave could be something supporters at an intergalactic championship football match did when their team annihilated an opposing team’s player.

As I began to recover some pain free feeling in my upper body, I heaved myself up and off the semi conscious and prone body of the Prorex. She was groaning and moving her arms. I took this as a good sign. As I gripped each side of my lower back with my hands and squeezed, leaning back to try to relieve some of the tension, I thought that perhaps I ought to try to help her up. I crouched near her wizened head which was still pretty much flat to the floor and said,

“Madam, are you alright. Can I assist you in anyway?”

The Prorex mumbled something completely incomprehensible back. It was perhaps not surprising that I couldn’t understand what she said as the lips of her mouth were still pretty much glued to the floor that they had hit, when my fall had flattened her. However, as her face slowly lifted up, and as she continued to mumble and grumble, I definitely heard words like ‘idiot’, ‘buffoon’ and ‘moron’, in amongst a load of other grunting and grumbling noises.

As she pushed with her palms to raise herself further off the floor, I sympathetically put my arms around her rising abdomen and sought to help her to her feet. I must confess that as she continued to spit out increasingly profane comments, obviously directed at me, I felt very much like dropping her back to the floor. Instead I said to the Prorex,

“Madam, please, let me help you to your feet.”

At that I heaved her upper body towards me and managed to help her first to her knees and then, after shifting my grip to be underneath her shoulders, she rose to her feet. I let go of her and stepped back as she turned around. Throughout all of this she had continued with her loud muttering which intensified, the instant that she faced me.

“You complete total utter blithering fool. You mindless twerp. You cretin. You, you terboid trissuk!!!”

“Madam please, there’s no need for such abusive language,” I implored.

To be continued………

The Sequestran Dilemma – Chapter 2.10

Get me Down!!

“Will you get me down from here you pint sized little beast,” I yelled at him. “And why is this happening? I can’t believe it has nothing to do with you. Why aren’t you floating upside down?”

Cat positively miaowed his reply like a normal cat, that had just got their face stuck into a bowl of cream, probably would,

“You forget boss, I have my own built in hovering capability. Unlike you and the Prorex, I’m not dependent on old Maglev technology built into my shoes in order to take advantage of a hoverator’s capability to move me from one place to another.”

“Ok, and so?” I replied, “why does that mean I’m floating upside down being assaulted by this old bat’s undergarments?”

“Well,” said Cat, resting his chin thoughtfully between on one of his front paws, “I’d say something has gone wrong.”

“Bllurrrgh,” was all I could momentarily manage, before exclaiming, “that’s the understatement of the century you robotic ratbag.”

At this, Cat froze and his eyes flashed.

“Oh don’t tell me I’ve offended you,” I enquired sarcastically.

“Not at all,” responded Cat in his most houghtiest tone, “I am currently trying to compute exactly what ‘Bllurrrgh’ means.”

“WILL YOU GET ME DOWN FROM HERE,” I yelled at the top of my voice, “OR I SWEAR I’LL HAVE YOU TURNED INTO A MATTRESS!!”

“Of course boss, of course,” replied Cat.

It always fundamentally worried me when Cat was even vaguely respectful towards me and I wondered, somewhat apprehensively, what he was going to do. He hovered up and started to poke around with one paw at the chain of my watch until, thankfully, the Prorex was released from me. Well, that’s a relief I thought, as she floated a little away from me still grumbling, squeaking and cursing from underneath her skirts, which mercifully obscured the speaking end of her body.

The Sequestran Dilemma – Chapter 2.9

Just so Embarrassing

As the Prorex and I completed our turn and reached the perpendicular, our faces briefly bumped together before thankfully her voluminous skirts gave in to gravity and tumbled down over her face. What a relief I thought as her wails became rather pleasantly muffled. However only a few moments later her muffled wails became subsumed by my screams as, having reached the zenith of our turn to the upside down, we rapidly accelerated towards the ceiling of the hoverator.

“CAAAAAAAT,” I yelled, “What’s happening? Get me down. For goodness sake get this lunatic woman off me. CAAAAAAAT, I’M GONNA THROW UP,” I yelled!!!

Cat floated up towards me, totally under control, using his own but in-built hovering capability. As he arrived level with my upside down head he said,

“You screamed Master. How can I assist?”

“Don’t mess around you obnoxious rubberised furball. I know you know what’s going on here. So do something about it NOW!!” I yelled again.

“How do you know I know what’s going on?” enquired Cat.

“Because you always know you irritant,” I hissed.

“Well if you’re going to be rude about it you can jolly well stay stuck to the Prorex for all I care,” responded Cat in a very haughty manner. “It’ll make for a very pretty picture for the office at HQ,” jeered Cat.

At that, he kindly aircast a picture of my circumstances about half a metre beneath the top of my head. I mean I knew I was dangling upside down but seeing the whole picture was something else. There I was hanging, feet to the ceiling, with my long hair tumbling from the top of my head floor-ward. As he panned around I could see the body of the Prorex, appearing almost magically attached to me, in the kind of perfect symmetrical harmony normally associated with stratonasts performing an aerial routine.

The top half of the Prorex, from the waist down to her head, was totally obscured by her voluminous skirts and petticoats. From the waist up to her feet I could see bright orange undergarments, made of some frighteningly shiny material, running all the way to her knees. From where the bloomers ended, spindly legs stuck out ending in ankles covered by blue stripy socks and encased, where ankles ended and feet started, by bright red shoes. The shoes had oversized yellow bows at the toe end. A nice touch I thought as rage started to grow inside me with the realisation that Cat the rat was doubtless aircasting these images back to HQ for a laugh at my expense!

To be continued…….

The Sequestran Dilemma – Chapter 2.6

Meeting the Prorex

We continued walking after we had passed the houses until we reached The Cumulus Circle. This was basically a pedestrian roundabout with hoverators heading off from the centre in 8 different directions. Each hoverator took you to one of the 8 Dromes that served to entertain vistors to the Old Thames Bridge who were not there for the history. A massive sign over the entrance to each hoverater indicated which Drome was the final destination. I started to head straight for the XDrome sign whereupon Cat made a very loud throat clearing noise, before hovering up to be in front of my face and saying,

“Errghh, wrong Drome boss. We want the CombatDrome.”

“Ahghh, well, yes. Of course we do. Ultimately. But I was just thinking that maybe seeing be one of the other Dromes working normally first might be considered sensible. You know, so we will know what we can should be looking for in the CombatDrome.”

“This way moron,” said Cat, pointing with one front paw at the hoverator almost at right angles to the one for the XDrome. “That’s the way to the CombatDrome, which is where we need to go.”

“Alright, alright,” I said indignantly. “Is it absolutely essential to refer to me as ‘moron’ in front of strangers?”

“Yes,” said Cat, “I like to be clear and accurate in such matters.”

Once again I decided that ignoring him was my best option and so with a squinty-eyed glare in his direction I turned my attention back to the Commander. He had been joined by a quite elderly woman who extended a rather shaky arm out towards me. As one of her fingers touched me lightly on my chest she introduced herself as the Prorex of the Old Thames Bridge. I had absolutely no idea what this meant and so simply blinked before smiling and saying,

“Excellent.”

“She’s like a Mayor,” said Cat, apparently trying to be helpful for once.

“I assume you don’t mean ‘horse’,” I guffawed.

To be continued…….

The Sequestran Dilemma – Chapter 2.2

A Big Hole?

Suddenly my thoughts were interrupted by Cat saying,

“Just forget about the XDrome you twit. We’re not going there.”

My eyebrows furrowed somewhat as I responded,

“Assuming, no, IF I were thinking about the XDrome, which I wasn’t, much, it has nothing to do with you. You are my assistant can I remind you? I decide where you go, not the other way around.

With a gentle hiss and a murmured phrase which sounded to me like ‘moronic amoebal shit’ but could have been ‘mindless ass and twit’, Cat started our descent to the Old Bridge. I decided to ignore him but then realised I couldn’t because as usual no one had told me what this mission was all about.

“Look you irritating pile of chips,” I said, “what the heck are we doing here in the first place? If it’s some tedious tax evasion thing why can’t you deal with it? Then I could look around the Dromes. Not the XDrome obviously, I mean the other Dromes. If it’s not a mindless tax evasion thing and something involving really nasty people or worse, aliens, then I want to go home now, regardless of the XDrome. Which I’m not interested in. At all,” I ended.

“There is a phenomenon. A happening, which requires our attention,” replied Cat rather unhelpfully I thought.

‘Phenomenon’ didn’t sound good to me. I don’t know about you but phenomenon always meant ‘something not quite understood’ to me. And something ‘not quite understood’ was too close to ‘an unknown’ thing in my view. As I had said to Cat on numerous occasions,

“Unknown spells ‘danger’.”

Naturally his totally machine led logical way of dealing with me, when it suited him, led him to pass a range of disparaging comments about my spelling capabilities. My efforts to explain that I was speaking metaphorically invariably fell on deaf chips.

In this particular case his response was,

“There is a hole. A big hole, and someone needs to look into it.”

To be continued……..

The Sequestran Dilemma – Chapter 2.1

Ye Old Thames Bridge

Anyway, the Old Thames Bridge had so much history associated with it. It left me awestruck just thinking about it. Thousands of years old now, once part of AngleLand I think it was called if memory serves, the bridge was an astonishing spectacle. No longer really a bridge as there was very little need for bridges of course with hovercars and buses as the mode of travel, the bridge was a thriving mini community district in what was now the Persona consortium.

Indeed, the original need for the bridge, to cross the Old Father Thames River had long since gone. Very little water had flowed in the Thames basin for many a long year, ever since the great droughts of the 2150s and 60s. The bridge now in fact had no connection to Terra Firma, supported as it was by industrial sized hover engines. And of course the surface area of the bridge was at least 200 times greater than the surface area of the original twin towered bascule bridge. The original bridge construction was still there, and formed the glorious centerpiece of the entire construct as it now was.

That centerpiece led to the more modern but equally famous Atmosphere Avenue where very rich people had homes. Beyond the Avenue was Cumulous Circle, from which multiple footways radiated out. There were in fact 8 of these forming the so called ‘OctoMuse’. Each footway, essentially open to the elements like the original bridge centerpiece, led to a different covered RecreDome each of which had its own theme. There was the GamesDrome, the MusicDrome, the VideoDrome, the CombatDrome, the DreamDrome, the FoodDrome, the PartnerDrome and the XDrome. Most of the names were self explanatory apart from the XDrome. I had some obvious preformed ideas on what the XDrome was like, in fact had had these thoughts for some years on and off, and now was my chance to actually find out how correct my thoughts were….!

To be continued…….