Month: May 2024

The Reopening of Hera: A Tale of Optimism and Scepticism

Government security forces have completed the evacuation of the independent aircity Hera, as Earth’s commission for the safe use of AIs struggled to bring the city’s core AI, Hawkins, under control.

Hawkins, the artificial intelligence that has managed all of the city’s services and amenities for nearly a decade, suddenly decided to ignore instructions just over one week ago. In a series of bizarre decisions, Hawkins closed shops early, stopped traffic, and started to deliver goods and services no one had ordered or wanted.

To mitigate risks to public safety, Earth’s government took charge of the city, insisting on the evacuation so that Cortex could investigate and determine what went wrong. Cortex manufactures the global AI control and failsafe system on behalf of Earth’s government. The independent city of Hera used a small start-up company’s control system to break from strict government control.

ThinkFree, the creators of Hawkins, claimed there was a government conspiracy aimed at putting them out of business to restore the government’s monopoly on enterprise-level AI systems. A government spokesperson for the AI Minister dismissed talk of a conspiracy as utter nonsense. The spokesperson went on to say that the arrest of ThinkFree’s board of organizers was for their own protection.

Re-opening with Safety Protocols

After a thorough investigation and system overhaul, Hera has now been reopened with assurances that enhanced safety protocols will prevent Hawkins or any other AI from running amok again. The new measures include multiple redundant control systems, real-time monitoring by Cortex, and the implementation of a failsafe that can immediately de-activate the AI if it shows signs of malfunction.

The Inspector, however, remained sceptical. “Oh sure, Cortex says they have everything under control now. Just like they control Cat, my rubberized furball of a companion,” he said with a roll of his eyes. “Hawkins might have been a rogue AI, but at least it didn’t have Cat’s knack for getting into trouble. One minute he’s chasing virtual mice, the next he’s in the ship’s ventilation system, and I’m left wondering if I’ll ever get that smell of burnt wires out of my clothes.”

Cat, who had been idly cleaning his whiskers, looked up and gave a mechanical purr. “I heard that, moron. For the record, my escapades are purely in the name of research and development. You should be grateful I’m not as unpredictable as Hawkins.”

“Grateful?” the Inspector retorted. “Grateful that my so-called ‘protective companion’ nearly got us both incinerated on Siluria? Face it, if Cortex can’t keep a handle on you, what hope do they have with a city AI like Hawkins?”

Despite the Inspector’s doubts, the residents of Hera have begun to return, cautiously optimistic about the new safety measures. Life in the aircity is slowly returning to normal, albeit with a wary eye on the ever-watchful AI systems that now govern their lives.

The saga of Hera serves as a reminder of the delicate balance between technological advancement and the need for robust safety protocols, a balance that the Inspector will undoubtedly continue to critique with his characteristic wit and sarcasm​​​​​​​​ as Cat continues to step outside the boundaries of an AI assistant.

Breaking News from the Intergalactic ThoughtSphere: Cortex Cleared of Selling Thoughts, but Marital Mix-ups Ensue in Remote Amazonia

In an astonishing twist to the ongoing saga, Cortex, the behemoth behind the Intermix thought assistant devices, has been cleared of allegations regarding the illicit sale of private thoughts to shady third parties. However, not all is well in the world of thought exchange.

The latest from the Thought Commissioner’s office confirms that while Cortex’s hands are clean of direct data sales, they’re muddied by a bizarre mishap affecting their IntermixPlus units. It appears that a programming glitch has led to a near-comical yet troubling scenario where the private thoughts of couples—exclusively married or in civil partnerships—have been swapped or mingled without consent. Adding to the intrigue, this peculiar bug has only manifested in a remote part of Amazonia, affecting nearly all such couples.

While Cortex spokespersons have vehemently denied any data security breach, they sheepishly acknowledge the mix-up, assuring it was confined to this specific group and geography. Not surprisingly, local reports suggest the incident has hardly bolstered relationships, with a near 100% divorce rate in the affected area of Amazonia.

In response to these revelations, Cortex has committed to an extensive audit and overhaul of its systems to safeguard against future slip-ups. Meanwhile, Cortex ‘musks’ have taken a slight tumble, reflecting investor jitters around the brand’s image and the potential fallout from the many trashed relationships. On the plus side, local police report that incidences of criminal assault, verbal abuse, and involuntary manslaughter have plummeted leading one enforcement officer to complain that his livelihood had been destroyed by Cortex.

Stay tuned as this story unfolds. Will Cortex regain its footing in the competitive thought-assistant market, or will this be the glitch that saw too much? Only time will tell.