The Inspector and Cat were seated comfortably in their recreation room, the Inspector scrolling through his air-tablet for the latest intergalactic news when a headline caught his eye. He couldn’t help but chuckle before reading it aloud to Cat.
“Cat, listen to this: ‘Local Man Killed by Pet Gigglesnort: A Tragic End to a Cosmic Comedy.’ This I’ve got to read.”
Cat, always curious about the absurdities of human life, tilted his head. “Gigglesnort? That’s the name of a beast?”
“Yes,” the Inspector said, trying to suppress his laughter. “Apparently, it’s a juvenile pet from Xanadibar, known for its lethal way of… wait for it… tickling its owner to death.”
Cat blinked in disbelief. “Tickling? You’re joking.”
“Not at all,” the Inspector replied, scrolling through the article. “It says here that the Gigglesnort uses its eight feather-like appendages to induce uncontrollable laughter in its victims. This poor chap couldn’t stop laughing and, well, he laughed himself to death.”
Cat’s eyes widened with mock horror. “A deadly tickle monster from outer space. And here I thought my abilities were unmatched.”
The Inspector continued, “It seems the owner was unaware of its unique… let’s say, ‘talent.’ The beast was a clone, and its tickling technique was a well-known defense mechanism on Xanadibar, but it was somehow overlooked during the cloning process.”
Cat snorted. “Overlooked? That’s one heck of an oversight. ‘Oh, by the way, your adorable new pet might tickle you to your demise. Enjoy bonding!'”
The Inspector laughed, then added, “And to make matters worse, the article mentions that the Gigglesnort only reveals its tickling prowess when it feels extremely bonded and happy with its owner. What a way to show affection.”
Cat, trying to contain his amusement, said, “Imagine the sales pitch: ‘The Gigglesnort, a loving companion to the very end. Literally.'”
“Indeed,” the Inspector replied, shaking his head. “I just wonder how they’re going to manage the PR fallout. ‘Clone-A-Cat and AI4U assure all potential pet owners that all other AI pets are 100% lethal-tickle free.'”
Cat chuckled, then mused, “You know, I’ve always wanted a sidekick. Do you think a Gigglesnort would consider me too robotic to tickle?”
The Inspector shot Cat a playful look. “Considering your totally unreasonable over-reaction to my completely justified kicking of you to ensure a proper reboot when necessary, I’d say you’re far too prickly for even a Gigglesnort to consider tickling you”
As Cat tried to explain for the umpteenth time that a necessary re-boot of his system should not require the use of the Inspector’s boot up his rear end, it was clear that the universe was never short of surprises. The tale of the Gigglesnort would be one for the ages, a cosmic reminder of the importance of reading the fine print, especially when adopting an extraterrestrial creature capable of tickling you into the next dimension.
The Inspector and Cat 